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Whad'Ya Know? For March 9, 2002

Listen in to the entire two-hour broadcast. Or review the show rundown below and select your favorite segment of the show. Note that Parts A & B refer to the first hour and Parts C & D refer to the second hour. Part A Part B Part C Part D Problem listening to Real Audio? Get Help!

Hour 1

:00 - From Fort Smith to Boston, it’s program opening sponsors, and “the man who is multi-tasking even as we speak….”

:01 - All The News That Isn't. Research shows that cloned mice develop obesity as adults -- so, cloned humans may have to live in Wisconsin. Well, we're large-boned, so they'll fit in. Speaking of which, Monica Lewinsky returns. If you snap your thong in a forest and Bill's not around to hear it, can you still topple a government? Bush retirement summit breaks down into euchre and cribbage factions, the rest breaking for the early bird special at Shoney's. The administration may issue Social Security Guarantee Certificates printed on the back of Enron stock. Put them in a safe place with your Clinton Health Care Credit Cards; a lock box, perhaps? Vice President Cheney found to be heading a shadow government from a holler in West Virginia. The President only found out about it when he followed Cheney home one day. Which was against the rules. Democratic leaders are angry because they have no shadows. U.S., out of smart bombs, to begin bombing stupidly. Growing consensus in the administration to take out Iraq and run it from a shadow government in the hollers of West Virginia. The Pentagon will close its office of disinformation -- they've been stepping on Ari Fleisher's toes. Fleisher, the Presidential spokesman, blamed the fighting in the middle east, farm prices in the middle west, Kudzu in the south, and Marin County in general on Bill Clinton. Ex-Enron CEO Jeff Skilling marries another Enron exec to keep her from testifying. Ted Koppel to get buzz cut. Letterman will go to Disney /ABC if he's willing to make the adjustments needed to wear the four-fingered gloves. Georgia cemetery operator says it's all a big misunderstanding: for $299.95 the loved one gets dumped in the woods. Singing Attorney General Ashcroft to issue "tenor alerts." Tomato sauce good for prostate, works with meatballs, too. And here in Wisconsin, the UW Herpes Report confirms that more Badgers are taking orals than anywhere else, and that doesn't even include those defending their theses. Of course at Berkeley they get credit for it. That's All the News That Isn't . . .

:08 - Guest interview with Doug Marlette. Cartoonist, writer and novelist, Doug Marlette is visiting from the Carolinas. His new novel, “The Bridge” is semi-biographical. What one used to hide within the family is now material for a novel. It’s not just some Southern “Granny” novel, but a story about the non sequitor in this family gene pool.

:20 - – John and Jeff are not playing “Tangerine” today. They’re not playing anything that sounds like “Tangerine,” either. They’re playing “Hey There.”

:28 - In the audience Michael meets the Bayers from Michigan, some basketball fans who should be at the game instead of here, and Sara who can order a beer AND do the opening to the show in Chinese.

:36 - The Four Disclaimers and the Whad’Ya Know? Quiz. Aaron and Mark tell us more than we want to know about men’s bikini briefs, Fox news viewers, symphonic sections and intermarriage. It’s a long haul to the finish for these quiz contestants.

:55 - A jazzy tune to finish out the show.

Hour 2

:00 - From Charleston to Phoenix, it’s program opening, sponsors, and the man “who blames Clinton for the weather…..”

:02 - Thanks for the Memos. Teaching staff is not marking students tardy! There are a 100 students just hanging out in the hallway! Mark them tardy and get them into detention!

:04 - The Place To Be, Frozen Dead Guy Days in Nederland, Colorado. Trgyve Bauge cryogenitcally froze his grandfather and put him in a shed in Colorado. When Trgyve left Colorado, he left Grandpa Bredo behind and the town adopted him as the focus for their annual festival. You can still make it for the pancake breakfast and coffin races at noon! Find out more about the colorful Mr. Bauge at his website.

:15 - A little Rogers and Hart tune “Dancing on the Ceiling” with John and Jeff.

:20 - In the audience Michael fuels the debate between Hart and Hammerstein and two people have two very different stories about speeding tickets and listening to Whad’Ya Know?. Next time you’re stopped, claim ignorance or Feldman.

:33 - The Whad’Ya Know? Quiz with Katie and Bruce who show an impressive knowledge of feng shui, dog dramas, and the Warhol Family Museum. On they play in a quest for the mythical giant kielbasa!

:54 - Town of the Week, Winder, Georgia. In the rolling foothills of the blue ridge mountains, lies a Georgia town of certain Southern charm. Winder is one of a half-dozen small towns in Barrow County, and is named for John Winder, railroad builder and manager of the Seaboard Airline Railroad. The railroad's arrival in 1893 insured extraordinary growth in Barrow County. This town of 9,000 serves as the seat of Barrow County. The Winder railroad depot serves as a picturesque centerpiece for the community, and houses the Barrow County Chamber of Commerce. The former County jail has been restored as the Barrow County Historical Society and Museum. When settlers arrived here in the 1780's, they built Fort Yargo as a means of protection from Indian tribes. The fort still stands today, preserved as a historic landmark in Fort Yargo State Park. Agriculture plays an important role in the local economy, with the county's 400 farms doing more than 70 million dollars in business each year. Harrison Poultry is the largest of Several successful poultry businesses based In Barrow County. Grapes are also important, due to the success of the area's chateau elan winery. A railroad car manufacturer, thrall cars, is one of the area's leading employers with over 1,000 employees. Winder is also the world headquarters of clothing manufacturer, Duckhead Apparel. This is the home of the high school Bulldoggs, and its our Town Of The Week, Winder, Georgia.